So, I am coming clean. I found myself beating up on myself today for the things that I haven’t done yet which I should do in order to live out my greatest desires and dreams (or so I tell myself that story). But nonetheless, it’s still a form of beating up on myself. And it sure doesn’t feel good.
Luckily I have a wonderful partner who calls me on my crap and reminds me of everything I teach others. Hey, we all slip up every once in a while. The key is to snap back as quickly as we can and put the focus back on what we desire to have, not what we don’t have yet.
I have always said that “Beating up on yourself is like pushing the pause button on achieving your dreams“! From a Law of Attraction standpoint, it is a big “no-no”! WHY? Because beating up on yourself isn’t going to make you feel good. And attracting your dreams & desires only happens when you are feeling good and taking inspired action steps.
How can you take an inspired action step when you are feeling bad about what you have not accomplished? You can’t!
I had a client once who was beating up on herself simply because she ate fried food for lunch and after the fact she was feeling guilty about it. In her case, it demotivated her and she said “well, I might as well not eat well tonight since I slipped up so bad already today!”. As you can see, beating up on herself was not something that led her to a healthy decision. I helped her to pivot this and realize that she needed to let go of what she ate at lunch and make peace with it. Also, once she started to let go and not beat up on herself so much, she realize that she could make a far more empowering decision for the rest of the night.
Simply stated … beating up on yourself is a negative vibration. It makes you feel bad, so it’s only going to attract more things into your life that you will worry about, complain about, feel like crap about … you get the picture, right? This will keep you from manifesting your dreams. Period.
Beating up on yourself serves only one purpose … to make you feel worse than you already do. So, why do you continue to be your worst critic? Maybe you believe that being hard on yourself will push you and make you more successful. How’s that working for you? I know that doesn’t work for me. When I beat up on myself, it doesn’t motivate me to take massive action and get things done. Quite the contrary. It just solidifies a dis-empowering story I am telling myself about an area of my life which keeps that story going and manifests the exact “match” to that story!
So, this got me wondering about why we beat up on ourselves and how we can stop the insanity and never do it again:
1) Maybe it is a habit. You’ve learned to beat up on yourself from your upbringing. But that’s no reason to do it. When you assess that it’s not serving you in any way, shape or form, then it’s time to make a decision and stop it. Pivot to what you can do right here and now that is different and will take you closer to your dreams, instead of further away. And recognize the fact that maybe, just maybe, the beating up is something that you learned from someone else and it doesn’t have to be something you choose to do to you.
2) Maybe you have such a high standard for yourself that you continue to judge how well you are doing compared to that “ideal” and as a result you conclude that you always fall short. I see this as a common pattern with my doctor clients who are always striving to be perfect and want to be the best at everything they do. Sure, this can be a motivator at times, however, often the “shooting for perfection” holds my doctor clients back because it’s simply never good enough. Often when they feel like “it’s never good enough”, that’s coupled with a feeling of overwhelm and eventually burnout. Nobody wants to feel that. And burnout will never bring you what you desire to have in your life. You need the energy to be able to keep on plugging along towards your dreams and never give up on what your deepest desires are. So, instead of shooting for “perfection” (which is only conceptual anyway – what’s perfect to you isn’t perfect to someone else – it’s a moving target), how about shooting for excellence and doing the best you can in any given moment. Realize that your best changes from day to day and be OK with that!
3) Maybe you beat up on yourself because you don’t know what else to do … it’s a form of frustration and at least you are expressing it. But there comes a point in time where you have to stop the insanity and stop spiritually bruising yourself.
Yes, let me repeat that … “spiritually bruising yourself“. That’s what I call beating up on yourself. WOW! Doesn’t sound so appealing, does it? How about spiritually loving yourself instead. Doesn’t that sound so much better?!
So, let’s start a movement of SPIRITUALLY LOVING OURSELVES!!!
Comment below and let’s get a conversation going on how we can love ourselves more and beat up on ourselves less (or better yet … NEVER beat up on ourselves again). How does that sound?